I'd shove him back into the oven until he is done cookin'
I wonder if I ever want kids, after last night. I like kids in the same way I like animals. I don’t like having to clean up after them or be around them when they are annoying. But when they are being cute, or sleeping who can resist them?
Last night The Man and I made some mistakes on our date:
ONE: We went to see a move on the opening weekend. This is a HUGE mistake when you don’t like to hear people talking during the movie.
TWO: We went to see a PG movie before 10pm, there for our theater was full of kids.
THREE: We sat by one of the families that had kids.
We went to see the greatest game ever played. Good flick, I think, I didn’t get to hear or see all of it. Now I know that normally when people say that they didn’t see all of the movie it is because they A) were making out during the movie B) you had to go to the bathroom and miss the most important part, and therefore the movie doesn’t make sense or C) you are 14 and told your parents that you are going to the movie, but then go and do something else. I didn’t realize that there were so many more options.
In my case it was D) you are sitting next a bratty kid who is slurping his soda for half of the movie. I couldn’t hear the dialog, because I as bombarded with SSSSS-LLLLL-UUUU-RRRR-PPPPPP. And I assume that the kid had been no manors because in between SSSSS-LLLLL-UUUU-RRRR-PPPPPPs he would gargle. This kid, who I also assume has ADHD, would get up every five or ten minutes to discuss the movie with is dad. His dad was sitting one seat way, so Mr. Elephant Foot Kid would STOMP AS LOUD as he could walking the yard to his dad, and then the dad would have a conversation with the boy. “DAD, WHO IS THAT. IS HE THE BAD GUY?” “I don’t know, I’m just your inconsiderate father, now drink your soda, son.” “SSSSS-LLLLL-UUUU-RRRR-PPPPPP” STOMP STOMP STOMP back to his original seat. E) You are trying to shoot lasers out of your eyes as the bratty kid and his father. I kept thinking aht my look of death would stop them. D) Father of bratty kid’s cell phone rang. He had one of those LOUD rings BEEP- BEEP BEEP- BEEP BEEP BEEP- BEEP- BEEP BEEP- BEEP BEEP BEEP. And the worse part was he couldn’t find the damn thing, he was franticlly looking for it was Bratty Kid was yelling, “HEY DAD YOUR PHONE IS RINGING. WHERE IS THE PHONE? WHO IS IT?…” and E)This is were I switch from lasers to NUCULAR BOMB LOOKS.
Are people so out of it that they have no idea that they are being rude?
Last night The Man and I made some mistakes on our date:
ONE: We went to see a move on the opening weekend. This is a HUGE mistake when you don’t like to hear people talking during the movie.
TWO: We went to see a PG movie before 10pm, there for our theater was full of kids.
THREE: We sat by one of the families that had kids.
We went to see the greatest game ever played. Good flick, I think, I didn’t get to hear or see all of it. Now I know that normally when people say that they didn’t see all of the movie it is because they A) were making out during the movie B) you had to go to the bathroom and miss the most important part, and therefore the movie doesn’t make sense or C) you are 14 and told your parents that you are going to the movie, but then go and do something else. I didn’t realize that there were so many more options.
In my case it was D) you are sitting next a bratty kid who is slurping his soda for half of the movie. I couldn’t hear the dialog, because I as bombarded with SSSSS-LLLLL-UUUU-RRRR-PPPPPP. And I assume that the kid had been no manors because in between SSSSS-LLLLL-UUUU-RRRR-PPPPPPs he would gargle. This kid, who I also assume has ADHD, would get up every five or ten minutes to discuss the movie with is dad. His dad was sitting one seat way, so Mr. Elephant Foot Kid would STOMP AS LOUD as he could walking the yard to his dad, and then the dad would have a conversation with the boy. “DAD, WHO IS THAT. IS HE THE BAD GUY?” “I don’t know, I’m just your inconsiderate father, now drink your soda, son.” “SSSSS-LLLLL-UUUU-RRRR-PPPPPP” STOMP STOMP STOMP back to his original seat. E) You are trying to shoot lasers out of your eyes as the bratty kid and his father. I kept thinking aht my look of death would stop them. D) Father of bratty kid’s cell phone rang. He had one of those LOUD rings BEEP- BEEP BEEP- BEEP BEEP BEEP- BEEP- BEEP BEEP- BEEP BEEP BEEP. And the worse part was he couldn’t find the damn thing, he was franticlly looking for it was Bratty Kid was yelling, “HEY DAD YOUR PHONE IS RINGING. WHERE IS THE PHONE? WHO IS IT?…” and E)This is were I switch from lasers to NUCULAR BOMB LOOKS.
Are people so out of it that they have no idea that they are being rude?
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